Has the world always been this mad?
In the aftermath of what is clearly a worldwide massacre not by terrorists alone but Mother Nature had a field day too. I can’t help but wonder how on earth am I supposed to protect my baby.
We lost 115,200 heartbeats this weekend. Between earthquakes and suicide bombers, both of which my fear is etched in their uncertainty ,more so, their sudden stealth mode nature. It’s days like this when even Mother Nature feels like she is in “attack, kill, dismember ,maim ” mode.
The thought of my impending death seems to be whispering between my lips, evaporating into my conscious and leaving traces of ache lingering in my chest. How do I prepare my daughter from the reality of death?
I thought I was becoming quite comfortable with the idea of dying. At least that’s what I kept telling myself and anyone who asked . But truth be told, I have suddenly realised that I am ill equipped to deal with talking about this with my child one day or even now. Between my own personal faith, religion, spirituality and inner strength, all of which seem to be waning since Friday night, I have only one thing left that I’m praying will give me the strength and guidance, that’s HOPE.
That burning light that gives us the courage to TALK to our children about living and dying and to practice both with kindness and courage . The courage to be kind even when life and death don’t go according to plan.
I secretly barter with my God not to take me before my baby is all grown up. Instead I will chose to barter with my soul,convincing it to be present in every moment, not to give way and be led by the nose by fear . Instead to live with accepting truths graciously and to show my daughter that nurturing my soul now will mean my spirit will soar after. Through hope and faith talk with her throughout us living, that death is part of our life.
As for how long I have, ….Memento Mori !